ABQ Beer Week Day Six--- I Respect That

Tree Shaker Imperial Peach IPA at Two Fools

Have you been a good beer drinker this Albuquerque Beer Week? I've been trying, but it turns out it's hard as a mufucka to go out drinking every night of the week. I ain't really bout that life apparently. But I do try, which is why I managed to sneak my way into Two Fools Tavern last night close to 10PM just to get a taste of Odell's Tree Shaker Imperial Peach IPA (more from Beer Advocate here). Now, that  name's longer than a Spielberg flick and I can't repeat it twice with out saying Peach Shaker or thee sthnaker or some shit, but I'ma let that slide cuz this beer's official. Oficial, en espanol. Hoppy aroma lets you know they didn't get soft in the brewery and target this to the Shock Top crowd. Nah papa. This beer's got some punch to it. And if you read my post yesterday you know I was a bit worried about whether Odell just took the easy route and threw some peach syrup or some shit in the mix, but my understanding is this some real, local Colorado peaches. I respect that (pervert from Sons of Anarchy voice). And those peaches do some wonders, cuz this beer's got all types of sweet peachiness that blends well with the citrusy character of the hops. It's easy drinking despite the high alcohol content.

I respect that.

So what to get into today? Much like yesterday ain'ta whole lot poppin. But there's beer and that's most important.

The biggies today:

Il Vicino Special Tapping at Two Fools Tavern (Time: 5PM onwards)- Ayo, Two Fools been putting in work this Beer Week. They seem to have the most events and most of them been worth checking out. Today's involves Il Vicino bringing two Irish brews, Irish Red and Irish Lager, for a special tapping. The first of these two will be on cask and if you ain't tried a beer in this way, at room temperature with low carbonation, it been about time you try.

Taps and Apps at Hotel Andaluz (Time: 5PM onwards)- Food and beer, my type of event. Basically you get four appetizers paired with four beers from La Cumbre, Bosque, Marble and Il Vicino. This could be a decent stop and at $25 not too bad, assuming you get a full pour with each app. But given dumbasses out here in New Mexico don't know how to act, can't handle their liquor and love to jump behind the wheel, most places can't give that fourth drink, so I guess this must be samples. Anyways, here's the full menu courtesy of abqbeerweek.com :

La Cumbre:
Strawberry & Arugula Salad with honey red onions & goat cheese- paired with Hefe

Marble:
Chimichurrie Grilled Prawns- paired with Marble Triple

Bosque Brewing:
Fried Lavosh chip topped with arugula, black fig, & topped with chilie sugar cured duck breast- paired with Scotia Scotch Ale

Il Vicino:
Artisan Baguette topped with herbed ricotta chees and sherried mushrooms- paired with Irish Red

 Odell Takeover at Sister Bar (Time: 5-8PM)-

Ayo, this that event, boy. Sister's a dope spot anyways, being mad spacious, having live bands, and a damn good selection of beers in bottles and on tap. Today they gonna have Amuste, Nitro Lugene, Nitro Porter, Myrcenary and Seasonal Red Ale on tap. Ayo, nitro, you read that right, Nitro. That's reason enough, as is the Amuste, which be selling for like $23 a bottle at Jubilation, so I think I needa hit this event and see if I can get a goblet for something cheaper. That or I'ma have to do a drink and dash. Now, Sister Bar got that hipster element to it, so be prepared to see at least one dude wearing a train conductor's outfit.

Beyond this, you got a Sierra Nevada sampling at O'Niell's and the Lips of Faith pairing at Gecko's and the Sunner Kolsch at Desert Fish going on, so there's beer to be drank.

Albuquerque Beer Week Day 5

No Beer Week for me yesterday.

Fortunately, I have a stockpile of beer from my Arizona trip, from my weekly visits to Jubilation, and from just generally being a crackhead with a need when it comes to beer. I get that itch just driving by certain places. I fed my habit by cracking an Alaskan Brewing Winter Ale and Left Hand Good Juju, both of which I had for the first time. I don't care if it's spring, that Winter was dope. The spruce tips added to the brew created a sweet berry taste with a piney stickiness that felt great in my mouth, no George Takei, you feel me? The Good Juju is laced with ginger and the smell and taste are dominated by it, though it's not a bad thing. I could sip one occasionally but wouldn't go out of my way for this. This beer's kinda like that girl you got in your contacts but don't call until you've been rejected by a few others first.

Anyways, I would've liked to hear some bluegrass at Marble Brewery yesterday, but asi es la vida.

On to today, Day 5 in this glorious week of excuses to drink more beer. Here's what's poppin:

Marble Brewery Beer and Cheese Pairing (Time: 4 to 7PM)- I've already posted about this a few days ago so I'll let you bums scroll down a few and do some heavy lifting. But this should be awite. I mean, I'd prefer some barbecue or some burgers or tacos or some shit a little more filling, but I've never objected to cheese. I guess my big concern with this event is what type of herbs such an event might attract. I never been to a wine and cheese party and there's a reason why: I'd probably have to choke out one dude for describing why my view on dealing with all the bums that line Central (get them the eff outta here) is Hobbesian or Lockesian or whatever the fuck, then I'd have to smack some other dude for insisting that there really isn't a classic American novel, some other mamaguevo would just be looking at me contemptuously with his waxed moustache and Paul Bunyan outfit and then I'd just have to hope a stray bullet hit me and put me out of my misery. Marble Brewery, can you assure me I'm not gonna have to put up with the same ridiculousness? Either way, there's some good beers on tap and I'd recommend that 505-2013 while it lasts, plus The Abbey, the Stout Americano and The Double White. Rock solid beers to steal a quote from the Marble heads.

Five Star Burgers Sliders and Suds (Time 6 to 9PM)- I was just talking about burgers and fwakata! here's a burger and beer event. This could be good. La Cumbre Elevated IPA, Marble Stout and Wheat, and Monk's Wit (brewed up at the monastery by Abiquiu, for those that don't know, now you know, ninjas) paired with different sliders. According to the ABQ Beer Week site, it's three different burgers (green chile, greek, and Taos) and jalapeno caps and 5 ounce samples of the beers for $20. Pretty sweet deal actually. Only problem, I have no idea where this Five Star is---I hit B2B on Central for my burger and beer fix---so I'ma check the Yelp link here.

Yeah, so this is at Wyoming and Academy which is the sticks to me, but if you live up near the mountains, you may wanna check this.

Other than that, it's mostly just tastings around town:

Deschutes is doing a sampling at O'Niell's Nob Hill, which could be cool if they were bringing The Abyss , but chances are it's just gonna be the same shit you see around town any day of the week. Plus, I went about a month ago for a Rogue sampling and it was the most pinche samplings outside of a Total Wine store I'd ever seen.

Two Fools will be tapping Odell's Treeshaker Imperial Peach IPA, which sounds cool if not being the biggest gimmick in New Mexico since that other brewery started slapping "Isotopes" and "Alien" all over their beers to turn them into the Disney World of New Mexico craft beer. I'm all for adventurous beers, but are you just throwing some liquid peach flavoring in the mix or using real peaches? Cheap bastards.

Of course, Sunner is still on tap at Desert Fish, Gecko's still has the Lips of Faith taps, and Nob Hill Bar and Grill still has the Lips of Faith Smores Porter on tap, so if you need a beer, this ain't the prohibition era.

Finally, a reminder that the one event you don't wanna miss is the Blues and Brews Festival on Saturday to sample a ton of beers and hear---surprise, mothafuckas!!!---blues music. Also, if you Twitter and Instagram savvy, follow @albrewquerque to stay in the loop or like the Albrewquerque Facebook page.

Hasta la proxima, cabrones.

Albuquerque Beer Week Day 4

Back with more of that Albuquerque Beer Week smack. I survived yesterday despite hitting four different beer week events, one of which just as I prophesied, (that Total Wine bullshit) was complete and utter trash. When the people working the event aren't aware there's an event going on---"Uh, yeah, I think the beer event was yesterday"---then you know you fucked up. Total Wine is just trash, yo. Ohhhh, and to top it off, for BEER WEEK, these herbs gonna try to pass off some fake ass craft beer to customers. They had that bullshit Leinenkugel, and that bullshit Shiner Red Ruby or some shit, and then Batch-whatever-the-fuck-number-to-sound-like-craft, a Coors concoction that tries to pretend it's some brewing upstart. Read your labels, yo, like the Gza said.

As for today, there aren't the wealth of events like the first few days, which don't make no fucking sense to me cuz it's Sunday and it should be nothing but Beer Week events. Like they should really just shut the whole city down and order everybody to attend. Like this zoo visit I gotta do this afternoon, should be like a "Dogfish Head Takes Over the Bio Park" type deal. Instead, they got some bullshit NM Brewers Golf Tournament, which is just the worst shit I've ever heard. I don't golf, so that's part of it, but yo, that's a yuppified ass game to be linking with beer. And yes, I know mufuckas drink and smack they golf balls around, but that game is pretty removed from the regular type mufuckas that drink beer. What they needed to do was set up an MMA tournament and have those same fucks hitting golf balls beat the shit out of each other in a cage match. Or at least some tackle football or some shit, something where these pussies would've at least pulled a muscle and shit. So yeah, fuck that golf tournament.

Then there's the New Belgium Brewing Brunch at Nob Hill Bar and Grill (Time: 12 to 3 PM)- I read over at the abqbeerweek.com website that they gonna be making beermosas. The fuck? Take that pussy shit to a Lady Lobo game. That corrupting of what should be beer good enough to stand on its own has no business in Beer Week. But, I would swing by here to taste this Smores Porter that they supposedly got, a new New Belgium. But literally, I'd go in, order that shit, drink that shit with my head down not even making eye contact with any mufucka in this bar, pay for that shit, and duck out. No reason to spend more than 15-20 minutes at this event.

Pint for Pint at Tractor Brewing Company (Time: 12 to 5:30 PM)- I've already shared my feelings about Tractor in other posts (you can look that shit up yourself, I'm not hyperlinking my own link from yesterday) so they already on shaky ground for any event. But then they gonna mix blood and beer? They want me to give this beer-and-alcohol laced blood to some unfortunate soul? I'll pass, b. I'm tryna drink and dassit. But yo, I guess this some real feel good shit to make the brewers and the drinkers of the world feel like we ain't all just a bunch of drunks. Personally, I don't mind feeling like just a bunch of drunks.

Fun Run and Fundraiser at Bosque Brewing Co. (Time: 1PM)- Bosque hovering around Tractor levels as far as their beers go. I definitely wouldn't go outta my way for their beer or for this event. Look, I don't wanna give blood and drink beer and I don't wanna run and drink beer. I wanna watch sports, play table games, and be lazy and drink beer. Do a fundraiser where you commit to those things, like for every I watch TV and drink a beer, and I'll sign my name in blood.

Silly Saison at Two Fools (Time: 5:30PM)- Yeah, so I had to check to see if this was a beer or some stupid name they'd come up with for the event. It turns out its a stupid name for a beer they gon have over at Two Fools. Now, I've never had this beer before, but if the people over at Beer Advocate can be trusted (they can, mufuckas), then this beer is complete shit. So I'll pass.

Ultimately, THE SPOT YOU WANNA BE IS MARBLE BREWERY for their Bluegrass Extravaganza (Time: All goddamn day, which means like a 1PM start time)- Ain't no special beers here, but the music should be rocking, even if it's of that hillbilly variety (some of this shit dope though, really), and of course Marble will have some heat on tap. I mean, if you have or haven't tried the 505-2013, that's reason enough to go. So yeah, this is where you'll find me probably.

Albuquerque Beer Week Day 3

Time is limited here cuz I gotta get to drinking soon before daddy duties and other obligations prevent me from partaking in Beer Week related events.

Right out the gate I can tell you what bullshit not to waste your time with, starting with the tasting at Total Wine. I have no clue what they'll be sampling and I might eat my words if it's some super exclusive shit that you can't find in New Mexico, but my money's on it being some shit I could get at Jubilation any day of the week. My beef with TW from day one has been that they really ain't bringing anything new to the state so as far as I'm concerned they're just a big name. So yeah, fuck Total Wine and their event.

Other than that, there are a few things worth checking:

Beer Tour Festival at Nexus Brewery (Time-11 to 1 for tours, others beyond)- Yo, Nexus is a cool little spot and they be dropping some gems from time to time, like a great Brown in the fall, Barleywine this past winter, and that Imperial Creme. According to their FB page, these cats are doing not just 3 tours of their brewery from 11 to 1 (this brewery ain't that big so I can't imagine what the hell gone take that long), but also some Native American homage. A group called Dawa will be performing and they'll have fried bread and other Native goodies. RIGHT NOW, LEMME JUST GO ON RECORD SAYING I FUCK WITH NEXUS FOR BEING PROBABLY THE ONLY MINORITY-OWNED AND OPERATED BREWERY IN NEW MEXICO. Craft beer often seems the world of hipster white dudes, but there's really plenty of people of all colors seeking great beer. So yeah, this is worth checking today.

Perfect Pet Pub Class at Tractor Taproom Nob Hill (Time: Noon to 1)- I guess if I had a dog this might be cool, but yo, this beer week yo, not fucking dog week. And Tractor already on that suspect list with a lot of weak ass beers that I wouldn't recommend even to a Bud drinker as a primer to craft beer. But I will concede that I had the chocolate porter or stout (can't remember which it was and generally don't give a fuck) recently and that shit was fire. But I still won't be checking this cuz I'm about beer ya heard.

Il Vicino Double Barrel Beer tapping (Time: Noon to 5)- Yeah, this my shit right here. I love this brewery, really do. I like how spacious it is compared to some of these fucking breweries and love that I can always count on them to have NFL games on Sundays. Plus, their beer is just the truth. Odin's Red was bananas, ditto that milk chocolate cherry stout, and that CRAP, and I could go on and on.

But yo, they tapping two Belgians, a blonde aged in Cabernet barrels and a dark aged in bourbon barrels, so I'm hype for this. I still have a great memories of the St. Bob's Bourbon Barrel Imperial Stout from around Christmastime, so I'm confident these cats are going to get it right again. This starts at noon, so that's why I need to get showered and be the fuck out.

Anderson Valley Brewing tasting at Jubilation (Time: 2 to 4)- I'm disappointed they're not bringing any new beers, but Anderson Valley got some heat so this is worth checking. They'll be at Jubie's from 2 to 4, so you can hit this before or after your trip to IVC like I'ma do and be a happy man.

Of course, Gecko's still doing their thing, as is Desert Fish, so if you really feeling uninspired hit those. Oh, and Turtle Mountain is sampling Goose Island's Sofie, which for me is just ridiculous on so many levels. First off, Sofie been available for ever, second why the fuck a brewery sampling other mufucka's beer and it ain't even local? Third, Turtle Mountain ain't got beer good enough to go all the way out there for. So fuck that.

Albuquerque Beer Week Day 2 Aftermath

It's 3AM and I just woke up from a five hour nap brought on by Albuquerque Beer Week. Sometime not long after visiting Back Alley for the Tower of Sour, then Chama River Microbar and Marble for the 505-2013, then a quick trip to India House for some grub, I got home, lied on my bed with my clothes on and knocked out.
I can't say exactly which one of the firewater potions I downed yesterday was the culprit, but I highly suspect it was that 505. That mufucka got 9% alcohol but drinks like a damn ginger beer. I downed two like nothing then realized I was shtarting to shlur my werdz. Then again, I'd already downed a flight of sours at Back Alley followed by two pours of the Monk's Cafe, so maybe that's to blame too.

This that sour sampler for all you bitter mufuckas.

Any motherfucking way, this Albuquerque Beer Week's going to be a problem. If this is how the first day (for me, at least) goes, there's probably gonna be some vomiting, fighting, and shootouts with APD in my future. Especially as long as that, 505-2013 is on tap. That shit is dangerous.
Let me explain.
So you got this beautiful, copperish-colored beer smelling like a hopgoblin---you know, the originator of hops--- took a massive shit in it after eating a bunch of pineneedles (these are all good things by the way) that then gives way to a beer smoother than Brian McKnight's sheets. The beer got that nice citrusy flavor from the hops and then a balance of malt so you don't feel like you took a hop nunchuk to the throat. Best of all, that 9% alcohol is nowhere to be found like fathers in the hood, at least in taste I mean, cuz it definitely was there when I woke up not long ago with a mean headache.

505-2013, a karate kick to your face.

Chama River Microbar is every hipster's dream though.

Finally, I'ma leave y'all with a disclaimer and shit. I know this blog ain't the prettiest thing ever and I got some kinks to work out, but I'ma pin a lot of that shit on Blogger for being the Mark Sanchez of blogging sites. Or maybe I just an idiot, but this site got some goddamn kinks to work out, fuck. So anything you don't like about the look of this page, blame those fucks. Then go fuck yourself too for being worried about the look of this page and completely looking over the absolutely brilliant gems that I deliver. Bottom line, I'd write this shit on a crumpled napkin if I had to, so fuck appearances.

Albuquerque Beer Week- Day 2

Damn, I'm a failure. Nah, I really do suck at life. I was unable to get away from the house last night and attend any of the Day 1 events. I mean, most of them wasn't shit anyways, but I woulda liked to try a few European beers and get some relief from the hop-heavy American craft. Oh well, I took solace in some beers I'd picked up during recent visits to Tucson and San Francisco, sipping away last night on a San Tan Brewing Sex Panther and a 21st Amendment Brewery Lower De Boom.

The former is a double chocolate porter that, like most beers I found in AZ, has an ABV a bit lower than you'd expect from a double (it was a bitch-ass 6.8%). But almost every AZ beer I've had to date, the beer was smooth, creamy, and pleasure to drink. A good aroma of malts and dark chocolate prevailed and remained in the taste. I could easily have downed a six pack.

As for the Lower De Boom, this beer looks like some shit some clubber would be washing his molly down with since it comes in a slim little can that looks more like a shitty energy drink than a beer. Fortunately, looks deceive and this wasn't the stuff of sweaty EDM dancers. What it is is a barleywine style ale done well. A good nose of raisins and mild malt give way to a sweet grape and hopped up taste with a mild alcohol hit at the end. The beer is well-balanced and drinkable. Anyone could enjoy this one.


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ALBUQUERQUE BEER WEEK CHAT STARTS HERE FOR YOU IMPATIENT MUFUCKAS
Anyways, that's how my beer week started off, but I wanna give my assessment of today's jumpoffs.

I'll go ahead and tell you right now my plans, which are to hit Back Alley Draft House straight from work for their Tower of Sour event and follow that up with a visit to Marble or La Cumbre to try the 505/2013. But if y'all wanna be dumb and go to some of these other bullshit events, here's what's cracking across the city:

Greenflash and Ska Brewing at Imbibe Cigar Bar- Ayo, did I mention fuck this place. Two respectable brewers that I'd otherwise check for, but I'd rather sit in a classroom listening to people drag their nails across the chalkboard while having the FBI stuff splinters under my nails while pigeons peck out my eyeballs and Gotye's "Somebody That I Used to Know" plays on repeat then go to this piece of shit bar.

Beer Flights and Beer Brats at Sandia Chile Grill- This spot is a little seedy stuck in that shitty strip mall way out in Northeastbumblefuck Heights, but they got some legit beers. The father-and-son combo here put in some work and I respect that. I have had a few beers here and enjoyed them so I wouldn't mind hitting this up, but the only problem is I gotta book a flight, cross through customs and shit just to get to this part of the world. I'll stick to homebase.

Anderson Valley Tasting at Total Wine- Yeah, so Total Wine aka the Wal-Mart of the liquor game aka the Britney Spears of the liquor game aka they still ain't shit with that massive selection got a damn good brewery giving tastings. I really like Anderson Valley. Their Oatmeal Stout and that Boont and their Winter Warmer were dope. That last one was probably my favorite winter beer this past season. But I ain't diving to the wackass West Side and passing by a million other good beer events just to peep them. Plus, they'll be at Jubilation tomorrow so blow me Total Wine.

Goose Island Bourbon County Coffee Stout at Two Fools Tavern- I kinda hate on Goose Island because they got bought out by AbInBev and I'm sure it's only a matter of time before they cheapen up their formula and all the beers start tasting like a watered-down version of what you'd imagine or remember a good beer to be, but for the moment, I still fuck with them. Had that Bourbon County in NYC around Christmas and it is most definitely crack cocaine. Coffee stout sounds like they just threw some crack on top of the original crack. And Two Fools is a cool spot, even if it's a wannabe version of the shittiest type of bar ever, the Irish Bar. I think of Irish bars I think of drunk white girls rocking out to Bon Jovi or just white people in general standing around and talking and shit while loud music is in the background. No respect for the music and no impulse to dance. That's fucked up though.

Of course, there's also the two weeklong events I mentioned yesterday at Gecko's and Desert Fish, but this day two yo, those shits is played out already.

So,

Tower of Sour at Back Alley Draft House- Besides that really homosexual name ---yeah, I'm probably gay too because I imagined a penis--- this gonna be a good event. Back Alley is a gem that few beer drinkers know about hidden behind that shitty pizza place that claims they make NYC style pizza. Fuck them. Anyways, Back Alley stays getting some good ass beers on tap; they're always some beer you never see anywhere else in town. I asked the brewer/bartender (yeah, they got some of their own brews, plus some from this dude name Majin or some shit who is really nice with his) how they got all these brews I never see elsewhere and he explained that he goes in the distributor's coolers and snoops around instead of just listening to them say what they got. I respect that. So anyways, they gonna have a few sours, mostly Petrus, which is disappointing because I've had them before and wanted some new exclusive shit. But I still fuck with this event and these guys for being original.

Finally, yeah, so the 505 collaboration drops today. A big old monster of a beer it should be, although my instincts tell me that it's gonna be some hop bomb when they shoulda gone for a different style to give us some relief. We already got La Cumbre with their Elevated IPA and the seven million pale ales they do, plus Chama River with their complete bite of Elevated called the Big Lebrewski, and Marble's DIPA, did we really need another motherfucking IPA?

FYI- Some good events tomorrow, I'll post about em later today cuz there's no way I'll get to it tomorrow.

Peace my ninjas.

Cerveza y Queso at Marble

The information keeps coming in for Albuquerque Beer Week and I'm happy to pass it along to whomever.

Marble Brewery shared their menu for next week's beer and cheese pairing here.

I'm no expert on cheese but some of these look banging. You got goat and cow and sheep all in the mix. You ask me it's a recipe for a heavy night of farting and belching. Pretty awesome actually.

Of the beers, I've yet to try the Framboise though I was at Marble just yesterday and the 505-5, which doesn't come out until tomorrow night. For those that don't know, the 505-5 is a collaboration between a number of local breweries Marble, Nexus, La Cumbre, Il Vicino and Turtle Mountain. I moved to ABQ last year just as last year's version debuted and found it highly enjoyable. If my memory serves me, it was a beast of an IPA.

This year I'm hoping they tried something different as I often tire of the abundance of IPAs and Pale Ales (ahem, La Cumbre) debuting month to month at the local breweries. I'd love to see barleywine to be honest.

Anyways, I digressed majorly and will say the other offerings at the Beer and Cheese pairing are a mixed bag. I do enjoy the oatmeal stout for it's creamy, roasty, malt flavor and good drinkability, but I can't say the same for the Triple. This beer is why we all should bow down to the nicest of the Belgian brewers---Affligem immediately comes to mind with their outstanding Tripel--- , for their ability to create a perfectly balanced Belgian again and again. Marble's is heavy on the alcohol in the back end and doesn't quite mesh the wheatiness and malts to create a smooth, enjoyable beer. So yeah, I can't vouch for that shit.

Overall, this event seems cool but there's probably gonna be more pretentious Williamsburg transplants or aspirants than average Joe type motherfuckers that you'd actually wanna start a conversation with. Come Monday I'll give you my opinion on where you should really go that evening. And you will heed my advice.

Albuquerque Beer Week- Day 1

Albuquerque Beer Week pops off tonight with events ranging from the swanky and sophisticated to the scary and suspect. I'll give you a breakdown of my assessment of each event:


FYI: Click on any establishment's name for reviews from Yelp, including some of my own

ABQ Beer Week Kickoff Collaboration Dinner at Chama River Brewing Company- First off, this soiree requires a reservation and a big bankroll, so I won't be making it. I'm glad to see some heads are making big dough off this craft beer movement, but I've got little interest in a fancy meal with regular old beers I could get any day of the week while surrounded by the type of characters that spend big bucks to jerk each other off over dinner and microbrews. For the record, I've never been to this event so I may be way off in my assessment of what goes on, but the price of attendance and my experience with Chama River suggests I'm pretty on point wiht how I envision it.

Also, it should be noted that Chama River is owned by the Santa Fe Dining dude that owns half of Santa Fe and the brewery oozes a corporate/chain feel much more on par with Pappadeaux's or Red Lobster than a great local spot like Cervantes. Fuck that.

Pint Night with Santa Fe Brewing at Imbibe Cigar Bar- Yeah, so fuck this event too. Santa Fe Brewing's been at it the longest and I respect plenty of their beers---State Pen Porter, Nut Brown, Java Stout, and the Chicken Killer--- but Imbibe can tea bag my nuts. This is one of the worst spots in Albuquerque hands down. Why? Because of the shitty, auto-cock-riding bartenders that don't know how to quickly fetch me a beer with a smile and then go on dying slowly. Nah, they gotta take ten minutes to ask what you'd like when they're not busy and still come off as being peeved by your bothering them. So yeah, fuck I'ma go here especially for Beer Week? Oh shit, it's a special beer event, so that means they'll be extra slow in taking my order! Dope. Fuck that.

Eurotrash Night at Bird of Paradise Liquor- Ayo, peep this: they got a beer event in some hood-ass liquor store that you might end up having your car broken into while your inside sampling beers. Oh well, I'd actually recommend this one. This the one I'm trying to check for, because I generally ain't prepared to drop $15 on bottled beers from Norway and it turns out tonight you can pay that much to sample from several. I'ma try to make my way to this one if I can trick my wife into thinking I went to Wal-mart and got stuck in those shitty lines for an hour---you know it could happen.

Beer 101 Tasting at Marble Brewery- I'd like to hit this actually. I eff with Marble. They got some heat. I'd say they're the most consistent brewery in town and have the best command of the greatest amount of beer styles. So yeah, this would be fun. But ain't no way I'm getting away from my wife and daughter long enough to pull this off. I guess I'll just remain an ignorant ass beer drinker another 12 months till this rolls around next year.

If none of these events floats your boat; you ain't a billionaire for the Chama River jumpoff and you looking for some food with your brew, you can always hit Gecko to taste some of those Lips of Faith brews from New Belgium or Desert Fish to get Sunner Kolsch---on tap I believe. Personally, these are both good options, as Lips of Faith are usually on point and the Kolsch is a solid beer. I had it recently in a bottle from Jubilation, which by the way is the best damn liquor store in Albuquerque so fuck that Total Wine bullshit.

 

That Albuquerque Beer Week Jump Off

Hitting you all off with the inaugural post for this beer-fueled venture. Today the Duke City, Albuquerque, begins its annual beer week. I'll be doing what I usually do, hitting bars and breweries trying to catch every last drop of liquid gold that I can and grow this beer belly, but I'd like to take it a step further. I want to bring the world to Albuquerque, both figuratively and physically (especially now with direct flights on JetBlue from the NY City), and show them our thriving beer culture.

So, expect some beer shots (as in pics, my people), discussions about my favorite beer haunts, and an interview section. Yeah, that's right, I intend to interview some folks. But others in this fair city have already got the brewers covered, so I'm unlikely to go there. Nah, my goal is to highlight some of the beer nuts that make this brewery town and state so special; those characters who week after week blow a portion of their checks at the city's various breweries and keep them in business.

Finally, beer is just one of my countless interests and I'll inevitably intersperse other seemingly random tidbits of media and culture into my posts because I can and nobody gon' say shet.

Beer is great and it's even better with music, so I leave you with a classic beer-related jawn from my college days .

Oh, and for some shots from yesterday's 5-year anniversary party at Marble Brewery check for me on Twitter and Instagram @albrewquerque .